Over the last few weeks, I’ve seen a little note standing in my agenda and highlighted in priority red: “write my March article for the blog”. And every day, I move it to another date by asking: why is it hard, right now, to just start writing?
Often it’s because I’m searching too deep and I’m too much in my head. There is also my dear saboteur (my nasty little voice) Mr. Performance telling me; Christine your blog must be good to meet a specific need among professionals and of course your blog must interest the gallery! It’s amazing how I can, all by myself, put the bar very high. When in this mood, I quickly fall in a rational mode: I pretend that I am busy with various research and reading, I brainstorm with too many ideas, I run in circles, I procrastinate, I make lists and above all I try to keep control as if I had both hands at the command of an outstanding mandate!
This is not because of a lack of topics. I have access to an interesting bank of subjects and tools on coaching and leadership that are just looking for takers.
Does it also happen that you find yourself swimming against the tide about a project or something you need to do?
I have nothing against using my rational side (my analytical and cartesian thinking) while in action, but I find that, sometimes, it slows my creative ideas and limits my ability to be open to what is present. When it gets complicated and difficult, either before or during a project, it’s as if I hear an alarm bell telling me: stand still and realign yourself so that it becomes more enjoyable!
I stopped to think about it further. It was through a yoga activity, that the first click occurred. Let me tell you more about it:
One morning, at the beginning of a yoga class, Anne, our teacher, invites us to formulate an intention for our day. My eyes are wide open and I notice that there is nothing that arises in me, it’s empty. I’m thinking… is it really necessary to force an intention? While we do our stretching, the cat, the dog, the warrior’s position… Anne asks us to visualize on what our journey will look like. My left brain is quick to take control and an immediate response gushes: coaching clients, updating the website, take a walk with my dog, shopping, blog writing… Already the battle between my left brain and right brain was reel and present.
I do not know why, but a few days later, the story of Anne resurfaces in my head, and at the same time, something about it bothers me. I think I become delinquent to plan, organise and keep the focus on details most of the time. I feel that it becomes heavy and tiring at the end! I have a need for more spontaneity in my life and less controlling intentions or expectations.
Everything becomes clearer to me during a bicycle ride (I am currently in Cedar Keys, Florida, on board “Thank you life”, our RV). With my husband, we just went to explore the islands. And of course, I did some planning before our departure: I put sunscreen, a hat, grabbed a bottle of water and also a detailed map of the region that I put in one of my saddlebags. On the way we passed several small streets, dead ends, historical site’s panel and I’m tempted to take my map a few times to find my way and especially to make sure we do not miss anything that we really need to see. I continue to pedal and I think to myself; forget about the map and let go! Ah what a relief!
So, what did my day looked like? One surprise after another! By allowing myself to let go of the control freak and free myself to create with the present moment. Quite a difference in my day!
We found a nice cemetery nestled on the edge of the sea, a nest of giant Golden Eagle, a forgotten ladder on a tree, beautiful views of the seaside, crabs dancing on the beach, and above all, full of people who greeted us and smiled at us. It also allowed me to marvel at the little things (instead of complaining), have the giggles because I was going down a slope at full speed, inflate my energies, and especially facilitate all processes of the things I had done throughout the day.
Creating from the present moment, encourages us to say “no” to control & planning and invites us to say “yes” and have more confidence to use our emotional muscles without moderation (intuition, curiosity, 6th sense…) and put forward our natural forces. This facilitates to achieve our goals while fuelling up of great energy.
This afternoon, I sat down facing the sea, my iPad on my knees and I write my blog. Everything comes so easily. Nothing to plan, except to co-create with the sea and what it offers to me as a gift. I think to myself that it is possible to create whatever we want when our mind is free to see!
And you, which side of your brain do you use most to take pleasure in creating?
Christine Lecavalier, CPCC-ACC
Co-active coaching & Leadership